Sometime in mid-July, 2013.
Ok, when we last "spoke" the coach aka the Beast" had been safely deposited in the driveway of our home. Two problems with that; first, the neighbors think that the Beast is a bit ungainly in our driveway, and second we have no 50 amp connections available. Not to worry, your intrepid Captain has the answer...we will rent climate controlled storage for our coach. That accomplished, the Captain wires a 50 amp outlet for the exclusive use of the coach when said coach visits the house at Ocean City. (Surely the neighbor lady who complained about our new baby (the Beast) will understand the need for short visits to the home base?? Probably not, but ya can't be happy ALL OF THE TIME, can ya?).
After a few weeks of indoor storage, the Captain discovers that both the house batteries and the chassis batteries should be replaced. No problemo. Again the Captain turns to the trusty Internet for advice and pricing. YIKES!!!! Turns out that the coach batteries, of which there are five cost $735 APIECE!! The chassis batteries are $100 apiece. Here, the Captain will do the math for you in case you've misplaced your abacus:
Coach Batteries. 5x$735=$3,675.00
Chassis Batteries. 2x100=. 200.00
Maryland Tax. 6%. 232.50
Grand Total For this day. $4,107.50. And this is WHOLESALE, for Pete's sake!
One of the coach batteries
The Captain writes the check, gets help loading these ginormous suckers onto his yard trailer (the 8G batteries weigh 160 pounds apiece). Your Captain brings the new batteries to the coach and with help from good friend and sometimes ship mate Joey, installs these priceless gems in the coach. (Understand now that your Captain is NOT a wuss, but is still weakened from his months long lung infection of the recent winter. Ergo, help is needed to install the batteries. And no, the age of your Captain is NOT an issue either!)
Now, the part that you've been awaitin' for...namely the practice camping session. You'll no doubt be inspired by the sheer courage of the Captain and the Commodorable, as they carefully made preparations to SLEEP ABOARD their new baby. Since your intrepid Captain had previously added a 50 amp outlet to the home, the decision was made to spend the entire weekend in the DRIVEWAY. The Westies were invited too. The mutual commitment was made that under no circumstances would either the Captain or the Commodorable enter the house during the experimental weekend...such courage, such intrepidity, such stamina, such yada, yada, yada. The experiment was kept pure. (Unless Leslie, the Commodorable, snuck stealthily into the house once the Captain began his deep slumber. This is entirely possible since she routinely outwits your humble Captain).
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It was during this inaugural weekend that we learned everything (ha, ha) about our new baby. The hundreds of buttons, the heated floor, the toilets, etc. We also learned that the satellite TV antenna did not function at all. Another project for the Captain.
Now, brace yourself. The Captain, incurable romantic devil that he is, decides to suprise his lovely mate for their 28th wedding anniversary with another camping weekend, only this time 5 miles from home.
A puppy sitter was employed to care for the Westies and a "real" camping trip was achieved at a very nice local RV Park, Frontier Town in West Ocean City. Here, your Captain will spare you the routine details of the otherwise successful trip and note only the glitch we encountered.
The Commodorable is known far and wide as the most capable and competent ship's mate a Captain could hope for. Over the past decades, she has assisted the Captain in docking very large vessels in very small spaces under the worst weather conditions. So clearly backing our coach into the oak tree lined campsite would be no problem with her able assistance. Hand signals were agreed upon. The backing in commenced with the standard number (37) of gawking onlookers nodding approvingly either at the smoothness of the Captain in handling the Beast or at beauty of the Commodorable. The Commodorable stood dutifully in sight of the driver side mirror and with masterful hand gestures coaxed the Captain to ease the Beast to the right or left (starboard or port to those maritime sorts out there) as needed. This she did perfectly as she had done aboard large seagoing vessels for decades.
What the Commodorable had NOT done was to look UP to insure that the height of the Beast was less than the large protruding limbs of the oak trees. (Clearly the presence of imposing oak trees is not a normal situation when docking a vessel, unless the skipper has made a SERIOUS navigational miscalculation). Needless to say, the baby's "head" got bumped a bit hard on a tree limb. Note to self and to Commodorable: When backing up, look left, look right, look behind, and for goodness sake, LOOK UP!
Large, Immoveable Oak Tree or in Latin, the Coachus Destroyus
No serious damage was done, and a bit of golden tequila solved the wounded ego of your intrepid Captain. Ok, maybe more than a bit was administered, but 'tis a small detail.
On a very positive note, the Captain had previously installed a new DirecTV high definition satellite dish on the roof of the coach and it worked flawlessly. Movies were viewed. News was digested. Oprah was ignored.
In the ensuing weeks, the Westies were added to the mix and other nearby campgrounds were explored. All was right with the world, or at least our small portion of it. ( the Captain continued to ignore Oprah)
In our next installment, we shall discuss becoming what all pathway choices were leading to, namely WE WERE BECOMING SNOWBIRDS!!
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